Before I got saved I never had a supernatural God encounter that completely shifted my life.
By that, I mean my story did not consist of a life or death situation where I knew God had spoken and miraculously intervened.
Not only did I think people who experienced that were a bit crazy, but I also thought they were lucky to have been chosen to hear from God in that way.
I didn’t believe anything extraordinary like that could ever happen to me because my perspective was way off and my viewpoint was limited.
While I was growing up, I was convinced that as long as I kept my head down, my mouth closed, and walked the journey I was raised to follow, then I would be slightly above average.
I walked the plans that were expected of me and adopted them as my own. My plans were my identity. My plans made me happy, whole, confident, and set me apart. I needed those plans because, without them, I was nobody.
I wasn’t outspoken, or extravagant, or funny, or popular, and to me, that meant I was nobody. And when I didn’t measure up to my plans of succeeding, I was left with crippling anxiety.
Fear and anxiety made me believe if I did not perfectly execute my life plans, then no one would love me or support me. I needed those things to make me feel worthy and important.
During that time, I thought God was only concerned about the people He had chosen because what would He want with me? I wasn't even good enough to master my plans, so I was sure He wouldn't want me involved in His.
God was a closed door that I thought was locked from me with an invitation only key.
One Sunday, I decided to keep my word to a friend who invited me to her church. Why did I go? Well, beyond making a promise to a friend, there was a part of me that was wanting to connect to something bigger than myself. I thought maybe God would finally choose me and reach out in some grand gesture. And speak He did.
That day the Lord showed me that He had been waiting for me, protecting me, and trying to get my attention throughout my entire life. After that moment, I realized God is not only present in the larger-than-life miracles, but He is right here all the time, producing mini victories each day. But, we have to be open and available to receive them.
I started slowly walking with Jesus and allowed Him to reveal His character to me and show me where He is in my everyday life. The more I walked with Him, the more my heart and mind changed for the better.
My name changed from nobody to precious daughter, who is chosen and has a purpose.
I share this story because I know someone is waiting for the perfect time for God to choose them and move mightily in their life. But I have to tell you God has already chosen you, and He is waiting on you to pay attention.
God has been trying to reach you and connect with you but can’t get through.
You might be how I was: so caught up in your own plans that you miss the call and identity He has already given you.
God's love is unrelentless, and I am living proof of that.
Just remember to keep your eyes, heart, and plans open because you never know when a God moment will renew and realign your life.
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